Whats normal, right?
Sometimes I struggle to see “normal” moms struggle. Its hard not to look and think, “That is the hardest part of your day? Could you even survive the hardest parts of my day?” I often undermine the challenge of having a child with exceptional medical needs or precautions. Most days are so very tiring worrying…
Mocking Birds for the Better
This week I must have added two tiny mocking birds to my household because nothing said is safe anymore. Even normal words in the mouth of a toddler sound so inappropriate. Lucy’s new favorite word is silly, it comes out sounding more like the word sh*t. Which can really catch a parent off guard when…
A Sweet Goodbye to 2020
Dear 2020, Well lets just say you gave us all a run for our money, literally. For the world you brought much destruction: a global pandemic – several lives lost, an economic crisis, an outrage over democracy, plenty of karens, the great tiger king, new ways to wear masks, and lets not forget a twisted…
Code Blue
This is one of our most difficult moments. Please bear with me as time is a non existent concept for this event. However the fear and emotions of this night will live with us forever. We had been in the NICU for a few weeks at this point. The girls had independent rooms but they…
First Heartiversary
To Our Strong Heart Warrior, Happy First Heartiversary! On this day last year you had your first heart intervention. While in many ways that day was a blur, there are some things I’m not sure I’ll ever forget. I remember signing the consent form, for all the things that this intervention was to fix and…
Births Story Pt.2
Next step is obvious, we called parents to share the news. I tried to make it sound enthusiastic but I am sure it did not come out that way. I was terrified. I cried calling my mother. She was already at work but she assured me she would head right over with my step father…
Anxiety is a Mother
Anxiety is a Motherf***er. Yes I said it and we all have been thinking it. I have been dealing with anxiety since I was 12. Or maybe I had it my whole life and it just decided not to make my life difficult until I was 12.. It can be exhausting and overwhelming. When I…
Births Story Pt. 1
At 25 weeks and some change I went in for a routine visit at CHOP. The more images of Jocelyn and both girls they could obtain the more accurately they would be able to help her once she’s born. A few weeks prior I Began receiving cervix checks because Ii had begun to dilate too…
Took a Break
It’s been one hell of a week. Let’s just start with my nurse leaving early last week with a migraine. No big deal except it’s a new symptom of COVID. Awesome. So now she’s out a couple days getting test results. Girls have been unbearably whinny cause they both are breaking through teeth. Lucy’s top…
Jocelyn Strong
After 16 months I am finally ready to publicly share Jocelyn’s heart condition in its entirety. I have put this off for a lot of reasons. One being I didn’t want people if they knew how complex to look at her differently. I never wanted people to set expectations for her physical or mental abilities.…
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Following My Hearts 